Say you have a good habit like, “I go to the gym regularly.” To set up habits for success, plan when you’re not going to do it.
opt-in
When I have the mindset, “go to the gym 4x/week”, and I’m deciding whether I should go to the gym today, this is how I will think:
“Going to the gym is something I should do. It will make me a better person. Should I put the effort in and go today?”
opt-out
When I have the mindset, “skip the gym 3x/week”, and I’m making that same decision, this is how I will think:
“I normally go to the gym. Has it been 4x yet this week? No. Is there any significant reason why I shouldn’t? No.”
They’re the same decision with different framing. One framing takes willpower and the other doesn’t. One mindset is aspirational and the other is autopilot. Of course, both need reasonable goals - neither of these will work: “never skip the gym” and “go to the gym every day”.
“evidence”
I’m in the middle of reading two things:
- Ray Dalio’s Principles
- HBR March-April 2022
There’s an HBR article that references this research. It’s about framing goals. It claims the framing, “skip the gym 3x/week” is more successful than “go to the gym 4x/week”.
Ray Dalio’s Principles has a section that talks about the logical vs. emotional decision-making. It seems in line with what I’ve read elsewhere, like the book “Thinking Fast and Slow”. We make lots of “emotional” or “gut” or “lower-level” decisions. That non-logical side of us is portrayed as lazy and clever.
And here’s how this fits into my mental framework of habits.